Constant's pations

If it's more than 30 minutes old, it's not news. It's a blog.

Monday, January 03, 2005

FBI chasing lasers or their own tails?

FBI agents are a unique bunch. You can give them written directions to a terror site, and they'll still get lost.

Putting aside their 9-11 bungling that continues in 2005, we arrive at the mysterious lasers. Those things the pilots keep complaining about. Flashes in their eyes. As if their sunglasses weren't enough.

The curious thing is the Airline Pilot's Association. This is the organization that represents pilots. The curious thing is that one of their leaders came out with statements suggesting that the FAA hadn't done enough about lasers.

Uh, I give up. If the pilot association can't get the government to do something on a safety issue [an important thing, high priority], isn't that an admission that the association's leadership is ineffectual?

You see, nothing stopped the pilot association from developing an internal communication system to share pilot reports. Pilots have this system called "PiReps" which are pilot reports on conditions like weather and unusual stuff.

But if the pilot association is alleging that the FAA wasn't being responsive, why hasn't Congress looked into this?

That's where the smoke and mirrors comes in.

You see "lasers in pilots eyes" isn't a new thing. Go back to the days of spying over Russia, and you'll hear tales of US pilots complaining of strange flashes.

So why has it taken until 2005 to actually have something done?

Why "all those previous reports" were ignored by the FBI, along with the terror reports and specific allegations of threats against specific targets.

What's changed? Well, DoJ personnel don't have enough to do. They like to chase low priority targets. Don't have enough people in DoJ to go after important things, but always enough time to waste time on trivialities.

Besides, its always fun to create diversions the very week that the President's man is going up for a confirmation hearing. Give the moron something simple to handle, and he might be able to intelligently respond to a probing question.

"What are you going to do about this, Mr Gonzalez?"

"Why, I'll send out the G-men. Yeah, that's the ticket. And if they find those dastardly terrorists, we'll send them to Guantanamo."

"Good plan, Gonzalez. You're our man. Cigar?"

"Thanks. You want the leftovers back when I'm done?"

No, in reality the FBI is overstating the "sophistication" of anyone who can shine a light in the sky. Nobody needs "operational knowledge" of how a plane moves through space to point a light.

Then again, we are talking about FBI agents who have a hard time reading maps. So to them, anything resembling logic is "unusual" and deserves to be closely scrutinized as a threat.

And they wonder why investors are fleeing America. Too bad they don't know how to read operating cashflows.

But I digress. Back to lasers and the stupid FBI.

Once again, DoJ is overstating the threat so as to create the illusion that there's some evil dark forces at work here.

Chances are, its some kids with their new Christmas toy. But then again, DoJ was always good at ruining a perfectly good holiday.

Would you like to enter your stress position, Mr Gonzalez? That's hands behind head, and head between legs.

Very good!

In reality, what's happened is the FAA and FBI, despite 9-11, have for this long failed to coordinate their efforts.

And the pilots' association leadership can't get their own pilots to talk to eachother.

Indeed, all three require the catalyst of a crisis to respond. This, despite 9-11. Rest assured, they continue to bungle in 2005.

Thank goodness they have the distraction of a Tsunami. Oh, let's hope it doesn't hit Hawaii. Then the US will really have to go begging for a bailout.

Another Earthquake?

That's right--there was a 6.0 off the coast of India over the weekend and the animals aren't to be seen "as expected" off the coast of Hawaii.

Let's hope there are no nuclear plants near the coast of Hawaii. The worst thing would be for a Tsunami to hit a nuclear reactor.