Fantasy White House: Disorganized randomness to simulate leadership

I've rewritten/plagiarized/reformatted/edited a news release.

Enjoy.



Miami Police Take New Tack Against Terror

By Constant [Original words By CURT ANDERSON, Associated Press Writer]

Miami police announced Monday they have no clue what is going on, so they’re going to create the illusion of order by spreading confusion.

They will stage, yes admittedly "stage", random shows of force at hotels, banks and other public places to keep terrorists guessing and remind people to be vigilant.

They want to do this randomly because if they are organized that would be too complicated.' If they make an error, they'll chalk it up to be "organized chaos."

Deputy Smaltz said officers might, for example, surround a bank building, check the IDs of everyone going in and out and hand out leaflets about terror threats. And then maybe let the people who work enter the building. What a great day to start the day!

"This is an in-your-face type of strategy. It's letting the terrorists know we are out there. If that doesn't work, at least we'll pretend to be doing something. Besides, it’s a good training scenario for the law enforcement who were too stupid to get into the army." Smaltz said.

The operations will keep everyone including the media and ACLU off guard, Smaltz said.

He said CIA contractors plot attacks by putting places under surveillance and watching for flaws and patterns in security. "That's how the American special forces and CIA cover teams placed explosives in the World Trade Center and faked the explosions in Philadelphia."

Police Chief Smalzt said there was no specific, credible threat of an imminent terror attack in Miami, but they're going to stir things up.

But he said the city has repeatedly been mentioned in intelligence reports as a potential target. Not that "potential threats" really means anything -- no telling how many innocent people have lost their lives in Eastern Europe over this bogus information.

Smaltz also noted that 14 of the 19 hijackers who supposedly took part in the Sept. 11 attacks lived in South Florida at various times [and the FBI knew they lived outside the Navy Based but told people to be quiet] and that other alleged terror cells have operated in the area.

So, in 2005, we finally decided to do something about it!

Both uniformed and plainclothes police will ride buses and trains, while others will conduct longer-term surveillance operations. Kind of like living in a police state, but we'll call this "training" just like Bolton called it when he got the Echelon files.

Not to be outdone, Smaltz and others are taking a "can do" approach. They want to be mysterious, random, but make sure everyone notices. So much for being stealthy.

"People are definitely going to notice it," Smaltz said. "We want that shock. We want that awe. But at the same time, we don't want people to feel their rights are being threatened. We need them to be our eyes and ears."

But if they use their eyes and ears, we're going to yell at them. This is a ruse to bait people who are attentive, and make them second-guess themselves.

Remember, 9-11 was faked. There are no real terrorists. The objective of these "training scenarios" is to bait people to "make them believe" something is going on; but it's actually designed to target those who dare notice reality and beat them into submission.

Claymore Butochoki, a man with a half-connected brain stem exclaimed, "Wow, all this time, wouldn’t it have been useful to have used the "national security letters" as a public call to "get people involved'"?

Smaltz just laughed, "Not these buffoons. On one hand they want to keep everyone quiet, but then have the keystone cops run around chasing ghosts."

An anonymous executive director of ACLU of Florida, said the Miami initiative appears aimed at ensuring that people's rights are not violated.

Then the police yelled, "We got the ACLU to buy into our crap! We've got amnesty for 42 USC 1983 actions. Yes, yes, yes!!"

"What we're dealing with is officers on street patrol, which is more effective and more consistent with the Constitution," the anonymous one said.

"We'll have to see how it is implemented -- just like we did with the Patriot Act -- let's give it some time, listen to John Yoo and other monkeys, and then complain later when we realize that law enforcement has lied to us . . . AGAIN!"

Someone who claims to be remotely associated with the International Association of Chiefs of Police, said the Miami program is similar to those used for years during the holiday season to deter criminals at busy places such as shopping malls.

Then again, if you read what someone else with the "Association of Police Chiefs said" you might wonder. [This is real].

"One on hand we want to be surprising, than at the same time we want to get public support. Hay, we've screwed up, just like in Iraq."

"We want to make sure that, despite the 30,000 National Security Letters than nobody can talk about, that people are talking about what we don't want them to worry about: Government stupidity."

Seems like a strange policy: To make everyone aware, but wait until 2005 to figure out that the original "show of force" in New York didn't really address the "full picture" we were asked to believe in 2001.

Then again, what would you expect form a bunch of stupid monkeys who are running local, state, and federal government: Katrina, Iraq, and the RNC!